"We know that survival and grief are never finished. We know that a mother’s scream is a battle cry. We know that it is our responsibility to stand up."
The three of us were in the hospital; Cole and I were squeezed onto the tiny twin-size bed while Dani-Mae slept in the hospital bassinet beside us. It was around 2 AM and they were both finally sleeping after a long and exhausting day of labour and delivery. I lay there between the two of them, praying and thanking the Creator for my blessings.
Motherhood is hard. What makes it even harder is comparison, and all sorts of external influences, on parenting decisions. If you have been around Tea & Bannock long enough, you may remember this post on sleep and a baby from July 2017. I have contemplated going back and deleting it but I feel its more… Continue reading Sleep, a Baby (Toddler), and Mama Intuition
A night of dancing on Granville with an insta-queen and now real-life friend. We bonded over 90's hiphop and perusing a late-night sex shop. Getting lost on Burnaby mountains and shopping makeup, sipping sangria and sharing stories of men, family, and dreams. Eating tacos and getting lit at 11 AM, thick accents on point as we laughed and teared up, mourning and celebrating in the moment, like Indigenous women do. And finally, pasta and poetry shared on an adventure of lost restaurants, a decade's worth of friendship, and planning the next sleepover.
As a second language learner of Cree, there is so much to work through in terms of shame, anger and trauma due to the violent interruption colonization had on our languages. The camp provided a safe and nourishing environment to reconnect with the language with likeminded friends who are now family.
Raising a child off-reserve, I often think about how she is going to walk through this world. Don’t get me wrong – all of what is currently known as Canada is Indigenous land. Growing up Urban will not and does not make her less Indian. I’m raising a Dene warrior, no matter if she walks on cement or grass.